We probably are all aware of the importance of positive self talk, of how important it is to quiet the critic and talk kindly to ourselves. So simple, but oh how hard!

It’s easier of course when we are ‘performing’ well, looking good, keeping ahead of the game. But what about when we are greasy haired, overweight and tired all the time? That’s when all the sharpest toothed critic bitches come out to give us a thorough pounding.

I just had a good test when I went for my covid jab. I don’t like needles and I have been to so few places outside of my daily walk that I have developed quite an anxiety, that and being around people, so I was really in a bit of a state. But I called in my self support, meditated, did some affirmations, cuddled my dog, clutched my lucky crystal and thought, “it ok, we can do this”. Then I lost my glasses so I couldn’t find my booking number. I was scrabbling frantically in my bag while a queue formed behind me. I started getting sweaty and was breathing shallowly under my mask, which got caught on my hearing aid when I tried to adjust it. I got through that challenge and was next in line for the injection, attempting casual chat with the steward, but my voice was weird and squawky. I wanted some water but wasn’t sure if I could take my mask off to drink, when BAM! My water bottle jumped out of my bag, the top pinged across the echoing hall and the water spewed everywhere. “Sorry, so sorry!” I kept saying to the very nice steward, (praise be for kindness in strangers) “it’s not vodka!” I said with a laugh that sounded inhuman. Jab done, with more kindness from strangers. Ordeal over, so I thought until I got back in the car and noticed I had a bogey, ah well, hidden by the mask!

I managed at one point during my clumsy fumbling to say “It’s ok, you’re just nervous”, similar to what I would say to someone else. It made such a difference, it brought some space and humour into it, instead of piling hurt on top of fear, I just managed to keep a hold of the kind.

Pin It on Pinterest